I don’t really know when it starts but around the time you are 20+ people start asking ”So are you dating anyone yet? Nope? How about now? Now? It’s been a week – how about now?”
Give it another 10 years and it transforms into ”So? When are you guys getting married?”
You see, you need to get married so that everybody could move on to…”Are you pregnant yet?”
You move on and happily do all three (not necessarily in that order and not necessarily all of the three – tsk tsk tsk… you crazy modern woman, you!), but there is no time to relax, because…”are you ready for a baby number 2, yet?!”. And while we wait for you to pop that second one out let’s see if your 3-month-old is “walking yet?”, “sleeping through the night?”, “reading?”, “playing the piano?”
You will have to forgive me I just finished talking to my mother and she asked if Leila is talking yet, because, you know…
“you and your brother used full sentences before your first birthday” and while she was at it…
“all of my kids slept through the night by 2 months…”
“all of my kids walked by 9 months…”
“all of my kids napped and ate on my schedule…”
“what? You are still buying diapers?”
her perfect memory shined all the way through this one-way lovely monologue conversation … but as soon as I said “mom, do you remember when you came to pick me up from school in your bathroom robe? or that time you lost it in front of all of my friends? or the time…” NOPE. She didn’t remember any of that… I guess selective memory loss is one of the milestones of the older folks.
If I ever again ask you any of the questions above you have my permission to slap me upside the head.
P.S. As I was venting to Dennis about this he reminded me that we still have that cutout article from a local newspaper that his mom sent us about the baby who started talking just hours after birth. The baby pretty much said “mom”, “dad” and then later asked mom “where is dad?”. I know you are dying to know the secret…well… are you ready? Apparently the mother was talking to the baby while she was pregnant! How about that?! “So now you will know what to do the next time Daiva gets pregnant”, said my mother-in-law. True story.
So? Are you talking to #2 yet?!
It’s not too late, you know. You’ve still got 6 months to go, which is time enough to bake a genius.
-Robyn
Luckily the question game is not my mother’s vice. Instead, she just feeds Jack whatever sugary horrible things she can find, up to and including sips of her uber-sweet coffee (I know!) and her sticky-sweet (it’s Mogen David) wine (I know!!). I catch her doing it when I’m not looking. She thinks it’s great fun.
Oh those moms…. and how on earth do we manage to turn into the same ones… (not that I or you are becoming one of them)…
After tons of heartbreaking comparisons/questions were asked to me I resolved that the only thing I would say to a pregnant woman was, “You look great!” and the only thing I will say about someone’s baby is, “So cute!”
Because all the rest of it? Makes me want to knock the head off of whomever’s asking me. Grrr…