I am usually a pretty and easy going person, but then some days my type A personality rears it’s nasty head, does a 360 spin and then the crazy goes nuts over the cuckoo’s nest. And on really special days I can be an A+, which is the highest level of assholery and competitiveness. Like that time when I’ve decided to visit a gym that I’ve been sponsoring for about a year and right in the middle of my warm-up some 21-year-old hormone got on the treadmill and set his speed to 6…. (Oh shut up, you look at other people’s speed too!) I have no recollection of what happened next but I couldn’t walk for days. Or that time when my friend took me to her yoga class and I forced-pretzeled myself into a double helix just because the boneless girl in front of me could.
I recently watched another momversations video on milestones, competitive parenting and all that jazz (as long as there are mothers, this topic will never get old).
I will have to agree with Maggie Mason on this one – most parents just want to “help the kids to avoid some of the pain of growing up”, being behind, being teased and not living up to their full potential.
Leila was one of the last ones in our playgroup to roll over, but once she did everything else came in really fast and fairly early. She rolled over within the recommended timeline, but I remember the feeling of a slight worry… I remember looking up suggestions and trying to help her with rolling over… in hind sight I should have just relaxed and let her be, but HELLO? I am a first-time mother! I am allowed to get stupid with worry and self-induced panic until there is no more blood left in my brain. You grow, you learn, you relax more and I am sure by the time the second baby is here I will be so busy y’all will be emailing me with dude, shouldn’t your three-year-old be rolling over by now?!
In one of the seminars on parenting the speaker compared being a mother to a roller coaster with your child sitting in the first car and you riding right behind them. When your child is acting like a good citizen and is on target with their development you are right there behind them – The Worlds Greatest Parent! Up up and amazing! When your child is having a public meltdown or is not walking by 18 months your car is speeding down and suddenly everything is not so rosy anymore. Up and down, up and down you go for the rest of your life… The advice was obvious – get off the roller coaster. Easier said than done, but definitely necessary for your sanity.
So when the next time in the playground another mother asks you if your child is walking/talking/driving yet? Just look her in the eye and yell:
“GET OFF THE ROLLER COASTER! GET OFF THE ROLLER COASTER!!!”
.. let me know how that goes, mKay?
- posted 1 day ago
I hope that when the time comes when you decide to get off the roller-coaster, you will be on its “top up” and will stay there. But hey, the entire life is “ups and downs.” We would not know how great the “ups” feel, if we did not visit the “downs.”
I fully intend to employ that advice. Starting with myself, starting right now. “Dear me; GET OFF THE DAMN ROLLERCOASTER ALREADY FOR THE LOVE OF BOB.”
I would totally yell that because that is my sense of humor. I could just see the other person looking at me and saying, “Roller coaster, what roller coaster?”
the roller coaster reminds me of the granny/roller coaster quote in Parenthood- i love that movie! nice to meetcha
Yeah! I agree! And it’s wierd the things people check on, starting with birth weight. I can think of a lot more interesting things I would like to ask people about their baby than, how much did she weigh? Is she rolling over? I’m a very curious person, but it doesn’t even cross my mind to think about that stuff, so when I get those questions about my little guy, it makes me think I should be monitoring the pace of his crawling speed! I’m gonna get off the roller coaster!